It 's almost half an hour I'm here, but keep trying to explain rather vague. The truth is that I should let the words flow, but are too proud to do so and disclose the reason for the disturbance. So I try to explain other words, with the result that it is not clear even to myself. What are two months that I do not write on the blog is symptomatic of the fact that I'm fine. Not happy, but I'm fine. I still have a phrase in my mind:
"And then this time He looked serene. Not like last time." . In Italian sucks, but that was so, and it was nice to hear it. Let's say that for days I was so deluded that. Really. Then yesterday something happens. Of those silly things that mean nothing to your daily routine: open a drawer, put things away, replace the CD, put the books. Things like that usually do not cause disturbances. Then once you do it maybe at the wrong time and then ... Bum. And you're kind to the three in the morning thinking, and you can afford it. So send a message to the only person who could understand you but not because it is in your same situation, but because they find that
part. Opposite. He does not understand. There are three in the morning, do not blame her and certainly not insist.
"Forget it, we'll talk tomorrow by the" . It 's my astrological sign that I care about in these cases. And so I think and I think looking for a way to rationalize, but ... Has anything changed in me, I'm afraid. What happened? Or rather, what I
happened? The reaction should have been that. Sure, I can calmly put the pieces in place and say that, actually, did not change a comma on how I feel. But at that moment, hot, I felt a little something called that I should probably call
serenity. Christ's sake, serenity. It should not be bad, right? Here, the fact is that I see things in a certain way, and it was not just peace of mind that I should try. Maybe something a mixture of resentment, hatred, sadness, or whatever. Of course, not peace. Why serenity involves a kind of lightness of spirit that in this particular case should not belong to me. Maybe it's a victory for myself, selfishly speaking, but I see it as a defeat in a general sense. That 's what troubles me. And I watch Ally, then. Because there usually if I do not answer, at least way to proceed. And there will be a post away, on Ally. And word comes to mind when they told her that she will never be satisfied, because always looking for something that does not exist, or when a Billy confesses that at one point, to go forward, he began to think that if you did not do anything had left the marriage but she would come first
, which would have a first child
. Before him. It's funny how things, but I am realize that often we weigh our lives based on that of those who, in a certain way, there has been close in a special way. And that, what you say is a bit wanting revenge. To love without getting hurt, but it's a revenge in its own way, been done before. Are those silly little things that help you to move forward. I made two accounts, as well as I gathered my pettiness. A bit like everyone else. I do not know where I'm going to prepare, but I know it helps me to regain that feeling of unease that I feel I should have about this thing and yet I have not. Do not have had it yesterday and I do not have today. If I do not, I will feel lost for a while.
